Not Optimal

Yesterday afternoon I just wasn't feeling work. Rejoice was in a meeting with people from the AIDS Foundation (one of the drop in centers' bigger funders), there were some people from the WorldVision national office working on a pilot project they have chosen Kodumela for (giving all sponsored children ID's so they can be scanned every time there's a home visit...pretty fancy, eh?), and there were some people from The Population Council running focus groups with caregivers and children for some research they're doing. People were everywhere. I was holed up in Ledile's office trying to recover from the post office news and get some work done. At 2 I asked Rejoice if she needed me... I had a plan to just go lie on my bed, stare at the ceiling, and maybe take a nap. She sent me home.
As I was walking home I greeted all the people I know at the stands selling fruit, simba's (chips), cigarettes, sweets, etc. at the Metz Cross (where the main tar road meets the tar road in Metz). I greeted a group of people sitting with one of the regular women and before I knew it she was yelling, "Tsamaya, Mmapula, Tsamaya!!". That means go... run along... I didn't understand until it was too late and some man, drunk man at that, from Jo'Burg, was walking along with me asking what I was doing, where I stayed, if I needed a husband, and telling me that the people whom I call my family in Metz couldn't possibly be my family because they are black and I am white. "No they're my family... I live with them, they live with me, I love them, they love me... that's the story."
He walked me to my road where I encouraged him to go back to his friends and I walked on to see Maite, Karabo, Lethabo, and Charlie.
Sigh. Like I said up there... not optimal. I usually can get away with not getting too annoyed and distraction seems to work best for me in those kinds of situations... but I WAS NOT IN THE MOOD.
I walked into the yard and had Charlie and Karabo screaming and yelling, "Mmapula! MMMMMMMAAAAPUUUUUUULAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!" and we all giggled and jumped up and down and gave each other fives and "Sharp!'s". Margaret was frying fish, the kids were drawing with some markers my mom sent (Charlie had more marker on himself than anywhere else), and Maite was sweeping the back stoop. I sat in a chair and replayed the walk home... they laughed, we laughed, and then we all agreed that the marriage proposals get old for all of us.
"Maite, did you hear about what happened at the post office?! I really can't stop thinking about it, I'm just so mad!"
"I wasn't going to mention it to you, I know how much you like going there and I didn't want to scare you... I was there."
And that's what started a conversation about her being in line, seeing the gun, the three men taking her phone and her money, and seeing them drive off in another woman's vehicle. She talked of how she couldn't sleep that night... she keeps picturing the gun.. she's so glad the kids weren't with her... and she's just really upset.
When she started to tear up, I started to tear up... and then we quickly composed ourselves, laughed with the kids a little longer, and then I headed home. I told her at the gate that she could talk to me about anything, that I was around to listen, and I knew that what she went through in the post office was traumatic. She nodded.
The afternoon passed with me using peak airtime to call my parents before work to have someone listen to how mad I was, how hurt I was that so many people I care about were violated in such a way. I felt better when I hung up... and then, just a few minutes later, I got a phone call from America and it was a dear childhood friend of mine from Austin just calling to talk. Perfect timing.
I spent the rest of the evening washing some clothes to hang out this morning, washing my dishes, and finally settling down with my book and some comfort food (mac 'n cheese).
And today... I'm going to the post office to see how John is doing and make my regular appearance.